An extremely frustrated (maybe verging on angry) me

Tonight I am feeling angry, not sure if angry covers it or in fact overplays everything because if truth be told, this 'anger' is probably nothing more than pent up frustration at the things in my life that I don't like. I don't want to go into it anymore here but I am fed up with a couple of things and more fed up because I can't really do anything about them.......I need a plan. I need to do something but is now the time? My eyes are sore and my voice has gone (not because of yelling or anything like that but because of the cold) and I am feeling incredibly broke, so I don't know if I have the energy, but what I do know is this: I have to do something or I'm not going to sleep. If it wasn't so cold and dark I'd go for a walk (and also if I didn't have a cold)

I am completely limited in what I can do about all this. I really am. A windfall would help the situation amazingly. In fact, not only could some more money alleviate the problems/frustrations, but solve them. Now I know they are probably no worse than usual but a couple of things have bleeped me off today and it's making everything seem worse.

I just need to sleep. But that isn't going to happen anytime soon so I just need do something to wind down.

The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said. ~Peter F. Drucker

I listen so much to other people and just through the way I am, I analyse what they say and the words they choose (which means I always try to use the words I mean to use and make sure that whatever I say, communicates what I want to - this of course is not always successful as noone is perfect) and what someone doesn't say is just as important to me as what they have said. What someone doesn't say or what they choose to omit can matter. (Not that I can telepathically know what someone isn't saying, but I wonder about it) Does anyone else ever think about that? It makes me wonder if anyone has ever heard what I've never said.

I found it :-)

I am writing immediately after finding this thing that I lost because I am so excited. I found my ipod! The one I thought I lost months ago. Although at the time, I couldn't understand how I had lost it as it was only ever in two places; my room or my gym bag. I always used to double check that I had it when I left the gym and so when I couldn't find it a few months ago I was really frustrated as I'd always been so careful and it meant alot to me as Alex had SCUB put on the back of it. I had a feeling I hadn't lost it because of the fact I had been so careful. But then as the months passed I actually thought I had lost it and then today I find it at the back of my Nintendo DS drawer and now I'm slowly remembering that I put it there one night after listening to it in bed.
The only thing is as I found the ipod, I lost a pill and I reckon I'm never going to find that. Maybe anything that is lost can turn up again, but I really have given up on the countless earrings I've lost and that £5 note I lost when I was a teenager. But over everything I've misplaced, I've never been so relieved to have something back. :-)
SCUB

Time, at last!

I am hoping that when I've posted this, my blog will say the correct time as it had been bugging me for ages as it wasn't set to the right time. It was hours out of sync.

Não deixe para amanhã o que você pode fazer hoje.

Ok, so the title means "Don't put off for tomorrow what you can do today". This title is significant to me at the moment in two ways, in its words and its language.

Firstly, it's in Portuguese, and yes, I don't speak Portuguese, so why I have I written it that way? I've done it because the last call I had from a lady tonight at work was Portuguese and I felt frustrated because I couldn't speak it. It took about 10 minutes the get the spelling of a name and I just wanted to be able to say that it was ok, I speak Portuguese! But I don't, and I now I want to, but I also know it's ridiculous as I want to speak every language and I know it isn't possible.
So, secondly, the reason I picked this quotation is because it sums me up at the moment. I put off something today which I really should have done as it would have made me feel good, but I didn't do it...why didn't I? I'm not sure. There are also several other things that I should have done by now and haven't....I really need to cross off some of the things on my list. Maybe tomorrow. It's too late now.